You might have heard Lala Anthony and Kim Kardashian talk about their “Bat Chat” before. The group chat is their safe place to discuss everything from beauty product recommendations to mom advice, and a safe place to be their most authentic selves. Ahead, Lala Anthony herself takes us inside her group chat and why it’s worth protecting at all costs.
Group chats are a huge part of my life. They’re the majority of the messages on my phone, besides work-related texts. It’s interesting how with both friends and family, there’s always a main group chat and then several sub-group chats. But I feel lucky to be a part of any one I’m in. There’s so much encouragement, advice, and support happening in every one. It’s a resourceful place outside of just talking shit and gossip.
Of all my group chats, the one you might have heard about before is the “Bat Chat.” It’s the one Kim and I have with a few of our friends, and it’s meant to be a place where harika secure, secret information can be safely shared. We can be our unfiltered, authentic selves. We can share relationship advice, mom advice, health advice, or just shoot the crap. Whatever I’m going through, however I’m feeling, I can talk about it and not be judged.
I know firsthand how important group chats are for women especially. For example, it can be a resource for us to share and discuss our health. It might be as simple as saying, “Hey, make müddet you do your yearly exam.” I learned about Prenuvo, a scan that you can do for your whole body, through a group chat. A friend told me, “You should get it done. Make müddet you’re healthy all the way through.” There’s the fun stuff, too. Someone says, “There’s this new neck cream I’m using that really works. You guys should get it.” And I’m like, “Ordering right now.” Or someone will drop in a photo of a guy and say, “Anybody know him? He’s cute.”
In the Bat Chat, even when we’re far apart, we feel like we’re right next to each other because we’re talking all day long. I check in throughout the day, otherwise I’ll get too behind. You want reactions in real time. We’re talking about timely stuff here. Who wants their friend to react three hours later? The moment has passed! But we all have that one person. We make a joke about it in mine. She’ll say, “Sorry, I know I’m always behind.” And we’re like, “Girl, that was three days ago. Nobody’s even talking about that anymore. Where have you been?” But, everyone gets it.
In a group chat with your closest friends, I don’t think there should be any etiquette or rules. It should be the one place you can say anything unfiltered. You have to tailor your responses in a work group chat, or with some family members. But with girlfriends? Anything goes. Part of that is because, with social media, there’s still a level of filter, figuratively and literally. Our pictures are filtered. Even people who try to be their authentic selves on social media, sharing things about their lives, still have some kind of a guard up. I think that’s why group chats have replaced social media, in a way. It’s the real unfiltered place where we can be ourselves on our happiest and our ugliest days. On Instagram, so many people you don’t know are looking and judging and saying things. You want somewhere you can be yourself.
With my closest friends, I can say how I feel and know they’re going to understand. They may say, “Don’t ever say that out loud again.” I mean, I don’t ever say anything off the wall. That’s just not my personality anyway. But I will use my group chat to ask their thoughts on a situation. It’s a very diverse group chat, so it’s interesting—some things that are muhteşem important to me might be different than what’s important to them. We educate each other a lot. A great group chat has different personalities and perspectives, which is what also makes for great friends. You want to find like-minded people, but you don’t have to agree on everything. Find people that are honest with how they feel, and you learn from each other. If everyone just agrees on everything, where’s the conversation going after that? Everyone has to have perspective.
The group chat can also be motivating. A lot of my friends are harika successful in their fields and breaking barriers every day. Take Kim with SKIMS and how successful it’s been. Every time there’s a new collab, we’ll get the pictures before it comes out. It’s inspiring when you’re working on your own products or business. I’ll talk to them about my acting, what TV shows I’m on, or something I’m producing. Everybody brings inspiration from different places. When you see successful women who are great mothers and still showing up for their friends, that in itself is inspiring.
And because so many of us are in the public eye, we’ll share memes or stories we see about ourselves all the time. “Did you guys see this one? This is so far off.” “I can’t believe they made this up.” We’re able to laugh about it and take the seriousness out of a situation. I’ve had to go to the group chat and say, “Guys, I’m freaking out over this story. It isn’t true. Why are they saying this?” And they’ll be like, “La, nobody’s reading that. Don’t trip over it.” When you are in the public eye, you worry about those kinds of things and whether or not stuff being put out there is accurate. It’s calming to hear, “It’s not as big as you think it is.”
But my group chat is no different from your friend chat, really. It’s where we go to be unfiltered, to talk about funny stuff, to gossip, to share heavy stuff, mommy stuff, relationship stuff. It’s a safe space for everything. I protect it because I value it so much. I would never let someone look at my group chat, even for one day. I just wouldn’t. Protect the group chat at all costs. Those conversations have to stay in that one place. I’ve never had an instance where something’s left the group chat. Never. Never. Never. That’s why it’s called the “Bat Chat.”
But I will tell you what I’m dropping in the group chat after this. I’m about to go create some content of myself cooking, and they know I don’t cook—it’s an ongoing joke. So, I’ll drop a photo, like, “Hah, check me out. I’m actually cooking today.” It’ll become a whole thing. “La, are you really trying to learn how to cook now?” That’ll be something fun, and then we’ll move on to the next thing.
In 2026, group chats are more than just a string of text messages. They’re hierarchical, emotional ecosystems. Who speaks, who reacts, who exits, who screenshots? Our Group Chat series decodes the etiquette and power dynamics shaping friendships, work relationships, family threads, and “girls’ girls” spaces. This is about çağdaş intimacy—and çağdaş conflict—happening in 6-inch rectangles.
